A Thundering Silence

"...be quick to listen, slow to speak..."  James 1:19 

In order to speak we must be silent.  This thought sounds a little like John Moore's quote, "In order to dream we must wake up."  I have a tremendous desire to speak the word of God into peoples' lives to bring healing and purpose.  The problem is that my desire to speak often overshadows my desire for the word of the Lord - I want to be heard; I want to make my opinion known to others. 

I am praying and seeking the Lord for the humility to be relieved of the burden to be heard.  As I was praying and repenting for that this morning He clearly answered, "In order to speak you must be silent."  My commission is to seek His voice, not a place to speak it.  When His voice becomes clear, the place to speak it will also become clear.  I cannot reverse the way of things and find a place to speak but have no word to say.  That's when John Paul gets loud rather than the voice of God.  Not good business.

Lately, in the humbling of John Paul (answer to prayer), I've been prone to tears.  That's right, call me Nancy if you like - I can't help it!  These are not tears of joy or tears of sadness; they are tears of silence.  God has been rendering me speechless because He wants a turn in the conversation.  I can say that it has been some of the best times in God's presence that I've had.  I've had several of my friends ask me if I was ok, "You seem quiet; is something wrong?"  Yes and no.  "How are you?"  Wrecked and wonderful. 

We think of a prophet as a man who speaks the word of God - he is identified by what he says.  But a true prophet is a man who has first listened to the Silence.  We see only the words, but we do not see the hours, days spent in silence before the Throne.  In the days to come, the pure and unhindered word of the Lord will go out from His prophets.  But those true prophets will be men who are accustomed to silence; men who seek the thunderings from the Throne, even hating the sound of their own voice.   

"Then I said, 'I will not make mention of Him, nor speak anymore in His name.' But His word was in my heart like a burning fire shut up in my bones; I was weary of holding it back, and I could not." Jeremiah 20:9